You may have noticed that, after solving all the social, political and race issues surrounding Euro 2012, UEFA set their sights on the real issue of Euro 2012 – Nicklas Bendtner’s underpants. The Dane celebrated his second goal against Portugal on Wednesday last by revealing a pair of much coveted Paddy Power Lucky Pants, much to the disapproval of the UEFA suits munching on their caviar sandwiches up in the corporate boxes.
On Monday, Europe’s governing body for football announced that Bendtner was going to be on the receiving end of a mind-bogglingly severe €100,000 fine and one-game ban. There was jaw-dropping disbelief when the penalty was revealed, particularly considering the minuscule fines handed out by UEFA for significantly more serious transgressions in recent history. Among the dismay from fans and journalists alike, both England international Rio Ferdinand and famous crisp-flogger Gary Lineker expressed their shock at the severity of Bendtner’s punishment.
We can’t do anything about UEFA’s chilled-out attitude to racism or political oppression, but we can do something about the Pantsgate. We’ve decided to foot the bill for the fine. Paddy Power are paying Bendtner’s massively over the top €100,000 fine.
Ken Robertson, Paddy Power’s Head of Mischief explained: “We pride ourselves on listening to our customers and what we heard loud and clear yesterday was that Nicklas Bendtner should not suffer as a result of UEFA’s double standards. We don’t believe that Nicklas should be penalised for nothing more serious than wearing his lucky underpants which in fairness was only a bit of fun.”
Paddy Power are also issuing an alert to all other players intending to wear their own lucky underpants in the remaining UEFA fixtures to keep the string tied tightly on their shorts so that they too don’t face the wrath of the over the top UEFA pants police.
Crime and Punishment? UEFA’s patchy record of penalties
Euro 2012 – Russian FA fined £96,000 for fan violence ahead of the game with Poland
Euro 2012 – Croatia fined £20,000 for pitch invader, throwing missiles and lighting of flares
Euro 2012 – Germany fined £8,000 for fans throwing missiles onto the pitch v Portugal
Euro 2012 – Portuguese FA fined £4,000 for delaying the start of the second half v Germany
2012 – Porto fined £16,700 for racist incidents
2008 – Croatia fined £10,000 for racist incidents
2007 – Serbia fined £16,500 for racist incidents
2004 – Spain fined £45,000 for racist incidents