Over The Line

I score for you and I wink!

Thank you!

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To be sure this is the greatest moment of my whole life in sport!

For people of my age who can remember when picked herring were 2 dozen a kroner, these opportunities are to be coming along less often than you would be expecting. When they told me at the home that I was wanted to play football I though it must be that young man Sam Allardyce at Bolton again - or is it someone else now? it is so hard to keep track these days…

To be hearing that my own village of Sweden wanted me to play in a big tournament was a joy unconfined! And now I am even on the pitch, without my frame and on my own two legs.

Even better, our first match was a total success and we are winning by two goals to none, meaning that we can be hopeful that our village will be in the tournament for a long time.

Thank you for sponsor me!

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Aye caramba!

Maximum thanks for adopting me! But another boy in my village is getting all the goals, all I get is a stupid hug when he finishes his hatrick. He is nice boy but really, before the competition everyone said I was the best at football. Now I worry all my friends and supporters will prefer David to me. Even though he doesn’t have my long flowing locks and good looks.

But never mind, because my village is sure to win the tournament. I have seen the other teams playing and none are as good as us. Most are just rubbish! People say that our village is not friendly with each other and that some bits of the village don’t want to be in the village at all. They say we will start to argue with each other like all the other times.

But this time it’s not true. Me and my friend David will be winning the trophy!

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Zut alors!

Your support is, how you say, most appreciated, but at ze moment je suis tres flabbergasted at my treatment at the hands of Monsieur Domenech! Again I sit on the bench, lonely and unloved! After my year of disaster at Barcelona this cannot be! They say my nerve has gone but this is not true and I swear to you I will be back to demonstrate my elan and joie de vivre as soon as I can.

Has M. Domenech forgotten my beaucoup de years of service for France? At big tournaments in the past I have been set free to score no goals and waste valuable space on the pitch. Now I am having to watch Nicolas Anelka doing ze same job! I will admit, he appears to be a natural for the role - whenever the ball arrives in the box, he is disparu!

For now adieu, thanks to you again, France will emerge triumphant of this I am sure!

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Hello to my sponsors who adopt me on www.adoptafootballer.com

First of all thank you all for helping me this summer and make me happy and more better in the footballing contest.

But now something strange happened to me, a man from a place called “Madrid” says he can sponsor me even more for better money. This can even pay for my whole village to have pretty ladies and cars, and not just me!

Also in Madrid there is more sun, and nobody calls me a ‘cod’ and makes fun of my fancy skills. In Manchester it rains, and even worse, sometimes we have to play in Newcastle. Or even Sunderland!

Talk to you soon during the tournament which I am to be winning. Thank you!

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You’ve probably already heard about our Adopt A Footballer campaign. You may even have adopted one of the poor desperate urchins who will compete this summer without the support of the ‘greatest fans in the world’ - that’s you lot.

The great news is that we’ll be able to follow the exploits of our four adoptees - Cristiano, Fernando, Thierry and of course poor little Henrik - throughout the tournament. Or at least until we hear from their lawyers. Only joking of course, urchins don’t have lawyers.

If you’re not familiar with the concept yet, just visit adoptafootballer.com to check it out. You’ll need to hurry if you want to get a free t-shirt, but there should be plenty going on during the rest of the tournament. In fact, coming soon we’ll have adoptafootballer.com’s exclusive radio and television advertisements available to view or listen online!

Please, whatever you do, don’t turn your back.

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