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It’s our meeting and we’ll do whatever the hell we want. That’s the only reasoning behind what I reckon is pound for pound the most generous Money-Back Special we’ve ever offered.

We’re offering to refund losing win singles on every horse in the race if a Paul Nicholls horse wins the Paddy Power Gold Cup on Saturday! Considering that he’s currently running Chapoturgeon (6/1), Poquelin (6/1) and Tatenen (10/1) - well, ‘you do the math’ as our American friends say!

Who do I fancy? Well, it’s been donkeys years since an Irish winner of this race but I think Tranquil Sea could be the one for the bang-in-form Edward O’Grady stable. His double at Limerick yesterday only makes me more confident. This horse has a great future over fences and like Exotic Dancer and Imperial Commander before him the Paddy Power could be a springboard to greatness!

If you fancy the sort of long shot that made me famous (for being a bad tipster) have a look at Tom George’s Tartak at 20/1.

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A small snippet from the world of Australian racing.

 
Thanks to Martin Palermo’s last minute goal against Peru on Saturday night, Diego Maradona will have one more throw of the World Cup dice when Argentina take on Uruguay. The Czech Republic are in a equally desperate situation and are relying on San Marino to beat Slovenia to ensure their progress to South Africa. Resorting to new lows, even for a tabloid, Czech newspaper Blesk have offered the San Marino players 1 million Koruna which is about 38,000 Euros if they can win. “We will do the maximum for a win but our biggest problem is that we rarely score a goal,” captain Andy Selva offered.
 
Few things in this life come for free unless you’re John O’Donoghue or Jacqui Smith’s husband, so I’ll forgive Chelsea manager Carlo Ancelotti for savouring every moment of the lap dance he got on Italian TV show Chiambretti Night. Jose Mourinho and Capello have also been saluted in this way, but unfortunately there are no plans to invite Steve Staunton or Jim Fallon onto the show.
 
Ladies man Sven Goran Eriksson is reportedly interested in North Korean women and, while he’s over there, he might manage their international team. Allegedly Kim Jung Il is financing the deal by selling his porn collection and abandoning their nuclear armaments programme. That’s about as politically active as I get. Notts County deny that he can do the job on a part-time basis while the man who got Sampdoria relegated and brought Nottingham Forest close to financial ruin is allegedly Ian McParland’s successor. It’s not Guy of Gisborne, it’s David Platt.
 
FIFA’s new rules will hopefully help Wales stop being so crap. It still wouldn’t allow Frenchman Tony Cascarino qualify to play for Ireland though.

 
Steve Borthwick can see – metaphorically at the moment – the funny side to Olivier Azam’s attempt to turn him into rugby’s Ray Charles [Watch it!!]. Gloucester had the audacity to appeal the 12 week ban which was turned down yesterday while Jeremy Guscott believed it was accidental. Anyway, it’s all fun and games till someone loses an eye, then it’s still fun and games. “As the doctor shone a pen torch in my eye, he suddenly cried out, “It is broken!” the Saracen’s player said, “I asked if he meant there was something seriously wrong with my eye and he said, “No, the pen torch has run out of batteries”.’
 
David Haye’s preparations for his fight with WBC Heavyweight Champion Dimitry Bumpovski Nikolay Valuev are going well. He’s not spending much time in the gym apart from knocking the head off a cardboard cut out of his opponent.
 
Ding, ding – round 2. Padraig Harrington and Thomas Bjorn’s public spat over whether senior Tour members should be obliged to play a minimum amount of events has reared its head at the Portugal Masters. Euro Tour CEO George O’Grady, possibly upset at Barack Obama’s unmerited Nobel Prize win, will attempt to broker a peace deal between the stubborn golfers.
 
The line judge who Serena Williams told to ‘shove a ball down her throat’ is mysteriously missing in action. Colleagues think the potential of a repeat performance at the WTA Tour Championships led to her absence. Who isn’t scared him? I mean her.
 
Despite attacking a camera and a tree at last year’s Australian Open, John Daly is going back for a second bite at the cherry down under.

Posted in Being An Idiot, Football, Golf, Have I Goth News For You!, Horse Racing Tips, Rugby, Sportsbook | 3 Comments »

John Oxx has made the right decision – and, even if you disagree, it doesn’t affect our customers as we’ve refunded bets on Sea The Stars to win the Breeders’ Cup!

Retiring Sea The Stars at the height of his powers with nothing to prove is the correct decision. Many will argue it’s the coward’s way out. Cynics will say, “oh, he doesn’t want to have a George Washington on his hands” or another Rock of Gibraltar. As has been Oxx’s approach throughout the season, the horse’s best interests have been to the fore. Accordingly, it was the trainer’s decision - not the owners - who decided against a trip to Santa Anita. Yes, it protects his stud value – the colt’s, not Mr Oxx’s - it isn’t the main reason. He has nothing to gain from the trip.

Perhaps prematurely, the experts waded in on the debate about the six-time group one winner’s greatness following his Arc win. Some have even assessed him on that victory in Longchamp alone. On ratings some cited the mighty Sea-Bird as the marker for all things brilliant - which is fair enough. On race-record, though, the Guineas, Derby and Arc treble had never been achieved. Racing aficionados, however, have missed the proverbial boat with punters on this great Champion and have been swallowed up by all their own hackneyed rhetoric – the good and the bad. Sea The Stars is, quite simply, a hero and history will award him the tag of legend. No one else.

The Cape Cross colt may not have captured the imagination of the public like jumping greats such as Desert Orchid or Istabraq, but he was certainly loved by those who appreciate his wonderful ability – even those who opposed him through their pockets. Walking tall after the Guineas victory, Stevie Wonder could see he was a champion in the making. The steely, determined three year old has spectacularly delivered on his early promise and beaten all comers.

Some argue he’s beaten nothing, but he can only defeat what’s put in front of him. Gauging equine brilliance seems to be based on the manner of victories as opposed to its merits. This is wrong. Barcelona outplaying Man Utd to win Champions League 2 - 0 is surely more impressive than a 6 – 2 victory over Real Madrid in La Liga? Isn’t it? Some even have the temerity to say STS doesn’t deserve to be mentioned in the same breath as Nijinsky, Shergar or Dancing Brave. He’s deserving of equal acclaim. He’s my Nijinsky. My Secretariat. His unique Triple Crown, I can assure you, will never be repeated.

Posted in Horse Racing Tips, Racing, Sportsbook | 15 Comments »

Declan is the typical armchair pundit as he thinks he knows his sport – Horse Racing. Paddy Power have invited Declan to write a weekly piece for our new section - The Armchair Pundits’ Lounge. Today Declan steps up to the big league as we’re publishing his post on the regular blog. (more…)

Posted in Armchair Pundits, Horse Racing Tips, Racing | 14 Comments »

Some of them are even winners! Not such a great record on Day 2 but we had a winner in the Prince Of Wales Stakes which should have had you covered for the day. Onwards and upwards - Thursday features another great card and a couple of tasty outsiders. If they come in I could end up rolling around on the bed in a pile of money - like Demi Moore except significantly bigger.

As it’s Ladies Day let’s start with the fillies in the Ribblesdale Stakes. Now a greater collection of Oaks-dodgers I have never seen and on the basis that nothing really stands out to me I fancy July Jasmine at a very tempting 7/1. Sir Michael Stoute has two runners here and I don’t believe he’d do that unless he thought both had at least a chance, and more to the point July Jasmine finished 2nd to Midday in the Lingfield Oaks Trial.

Given that Midday then went on to be beaten by a mere neck in the Oaks itself, and that Jule Jasmine didn’t really handle the course that day, I can’t help feeling she is under-rated here and well capable of pulling off a win.

The main event for an awful lot of people is the Gold Cup and Yeats is the horse we’re all desperately hoping to see win it. It may put something of a hole in the PP balance sheet but there will not be a dry eye in the house if Aidan O’Brien’s star makes it an incredible four in a row.

But Yeats IS getting long in the tooth and at 9/4 he really has to be taken on. The column inches have been full of Godolphin’s woes recently but I believe they may just pull off this one with Frankie on board Veracity. He’s crying out for the trip and there are just too many question marks over some of the other horses at the top of the betting.

Last but probably least, how about Freemantle in the Hampton Court Stakes. At 11/8 he’s a clear favourite but frankly he deserves to be. After a strong run in the Dante he ducked the Derby to focus on this race and let’s be honest, this is a step down in class. Looks to be a winner all over with Glass Harmonica the only competition I would be concerned about - and he hasn’t shown much this year despite his reputation.

Best of luck with your selections on Thursday!

Posted in Horse Racing Tips, Racing, Sportsbook | 7 Comments »

“Don’t be sad, cause THREE OUT OF THREE ain’t bad” as Meatloaf never quite sung. World’s worst tipster? I think not! Now’s the time to turn our winnings into some serious cash / give it all back (delete as applicable) on a truly mouth-watering Day 2!

First up let’s get the simple stuff out of the way. Lush Lashes in the Windsor Forest Stakes is the proverbial penalty kick without a goalkeeper. 13/8 is about as generous as you’ll get (in fact it’s probably not available by the time you read this) and any sane punter is going to take that. I don’t even feel the need to explain this one, it’s a certainty! (more…)

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It’s here. The undeniable highlight of the flat racing season isn’t just about swanning around in a top hat and tails and betting on the colour of the Queen’s hat. There’s some serious horse racing involved too. (more…)

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It’s tough being a bookie. All week long punters have been asking me for my Derby tips. They obviously didn’t follow my Cheltenham or Grand National tips - if they had, they might have learned their lesson by now. My only defence is that I’m not doing this deliberately. (more…)

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It’s Grand National day and soon enough we’ll know the answers to some serious questions. Questions like should we do a Hell Of A Horse Count and less importantly, who’ll actually win the race?

The answer is we will be doing a Hell Of A Horse Count, but because it’s on the BBC I’m introducing the Willie Carson Standing On A Box Count - which oddly enough will count the number of times Willie Carson is seen standing on a box to appear taller when standing beside anyone who isn’t (a) a dwarf or (b) a child or (c) already sitting down.

HELL OF A HORSE COUNT: 0
WILLIE CARSON STANDING ON A BOX COUNT: 0
JOHN PARROTT BEING OVERLY SCOUSE COUNT: 0

==================================================
5.03pm So that’s it for this year. The Hell Of A Horse Count was disappointingly low because there was no Ted Walsh, the Willie Carson Standing On A Box Count was equally non-existant mainly because of the rather significant omission of Willie Carson and John Parrott’s complete lack of Scouse means that I’m going to have to watch the entire first series of Bread to get my fix of Liverpudlian banter for the day.

4.40pm: A bit like the morning after the night before, you may be a little confused as to what happened. We’ll try and piece it together as best we can.

WTF Happened To My Horse?
1st Fence Fallers - Himalayan Trail & Golden Flight
2nd Fence Fallers - Ollie Magern & Brooklyn Brownie
3rd Fence Fallers - Reveillez & Chelsea Harbour
4th, 5th, 6th Fences - no fallers
7th Fence Faller - Stan
8th, 9th, 10th, 11th Fences - no fallers
12th Fence Faller - Musica Bella
13th, 14th Fences - no fallers
15th Fence Faller - Cloudy Lane
16th Fence (Water Jump) Faller - Zabenz
Eurotrek pulled up before 17th Fence
18th Fence Faller - Can’t Buy Time & Fleet Street
Rambling Minster pulled up before 19th
20th, 21st Fences - no fallers, Kilbeggan Blade & Fundementalist pulled up
22nd Fence Faller - Black Apalachi, Silver Birch & Parson’s Legacy
23rd Fences - no fallers
Knowhere pulled up before 25th
25th, 26th, 27th, 28th, 29th, 30th Fences - no fallers
Hear The Echo & L’Ami pulled up before 30th fence

Best of the rest:
6th Big Fella Thanks
7th Butler’s Cabin
8th Southern Vic
9th Snowy Morning
10th Arteea
11th Irish Invader
12th Idle Talk
13th Darkness
14th Preists Leap
15th Offshore Account
16th Battlecry
17th Cornish Sett

4.30pm A real kick in the pants for punters as 100/1 shot Mon Mome trounces the field to claim the Grand National.

The result
1st Mon Mone 100/1
2nd Comply Or Die
3rd My Will
4th State Of Play
5th Cerium

4.05pm With 10 minutes to go, it’s a toss up between Butler’s Cabin and Rambling Minster as to who’ll start as favourite. My Will is on the drift.

Grand National Betting

Best of luck whatever horse you’ve gone for.

3.47pm I’ve backed Southern Vic for the Grand National because after studying the form, I think he stands out as a real value bet. Based entirely on picking my favourite colours, I’ll pick Fleet Street and based entirely on a name that has some random connection to me I’ll plump for L’Ami. We’ll see which approach works best for me but I suspect that actually looking at the form one will probably be the worst. We’ll know soon enough.

3.34pm AP McCoy wins on Grand National and he’ll be hoping he can repeat the trick in about 40 minutes time. Don’t Push It claims the John Smith Handicap Chase.

The result
1st Don’t Push It 9/1
2nd Leading Contender
3rd Oakfield Legend
4th According To John

3.15pm: I suspect that this just a rubbish fluff piece the BBC put together but Irish rugby legend Keith Wood says he’s backing Irish Invader, Will Carling says he’s backing My Will and Piers Morgan is backing Fleet Street. I suppose the idea is that they’re backing horses that have a vague connection to their themselves. It’s a shame there are no horses called Uncle Fester Lookalike, I Never Touched Diana and Gobby Former Newspaper Editor in this year’s National.

3pm: If confirmation was needed, that last round of betting was far more stupid than it was brave. Solwhit claims the Aintree Hurdle, Al Eile doesn’t even place and Hrady Eustace lasted about as long as a game of Katchphrase.

The result
1st Solwhit 6/1
2nd Fiveforthree
3rd United

And funnily enough, today’s game of Katchphrase has been won too.

2.49pm There’s a fine line between bravery and stupidity and I’ve got a feeling I’ve gone firmly beyond the brave part and backed Al Eile and Hardy in the forecast.

2.44pm John Parrott has really dialled down the scouse today so all of our counts remain firmly stuck on zero. Anyhoo, not too worry, square 4 is removed from Katchphrase.

2.31pm: With people possibly listening to the advice of world famous er … Westlife crooner … Shane Filan, the money has come for Black Apalachi who has been backed into 12/1 from 14/1.

2.26pm Doctor David didn’t want to know about it and was withdrawn at the start. Kalahari King made it a perfect return to the saddle by claiming the Maghull Novices’ Chase.

The result
1st Kalahari King 9/4
2nd Tatenen

2.12pm Square 3 removed on Katchphrase

1.52pm The honours go to Bouggler and Noel Fehily in the Mersey Novices’ Hurdle. If the big race gives us a finish like that, we’ll have had a good afternoon.

The result
1st Bouggler 16/1
2nd Copper Bleu
3rd Ainama

1.31pm: Punters have decided that the 9/1 for My Will is too big a price. He’s back in to 8/1 for the Grand National and is now joint favourite with Butler’s Cabin. After early support, Rambling Minister is going the other way and can be backed at 10/1.

1.25pm: Square number 2 has been removed in the most fiendish incarnation of Katchphrase to date.

1.20pm: Our Willie Carson Standing On a Box Count looks to be in tatters before it even got started. It looks like he hasn’t got the nod for the Grand National coverage on the BBC. I’m introducing the John Parrott Being Overly Scouse Count. Obviously he’s allowed to be Scouse - he can’t help it - but saying things like ‘now then, now then’ and ‘chuck’ WILL go down as being overly Scouse.

12.38pm: We’ve kicked off our Grand National Katchphrase game. There’s a £/€100
Free Bet up for grabs, so it well worth having a pop. Happy trying to figure it out!

12.22pm: Picking your horses for the Grand National can be tough. Normally, soap operas are simple to understand [can you see where we're going with this?] We’ve gone and done a preview of the Grand National that compares the horses to characters in soap operas!! Ever wondered who the Curly Watts of the Grand National is? Probably not, but find out with our not-at-all-patronising Grand National Preview.

12.08pm: This useful bit of information lark is going a bit too far for my liking, but the going at Aintree been changed to Good To Soft, Good In Places on account of all the tears Tony McCoy has shed at the track over the years. That’s only half true, but the going has been changed - that part was true.

11.58am: Not strictly Grand National related but …
We all know you need a good bit of luck to win the Grand National and in that case, Jenson Button should give it a crack because his farting good fortune at the moment. After his team benefited from all the rule changes to claim a 1-2 in Australia, the completely average driver has claimed pole for the Malaysian Grand Prix. Jammy git.

11.54am: We’ve already heard what James Nesbitt thought about the
Grand Nationaland if that whetted your appetite for the opinions of a bunch of minor celebrities, then you’re in luck. In reverse order of star status:

Andrea Roche: (Irish person who is sometimes in the paper because she looks half decent)
My Will
Glenda Gilson: (Brian O’Driscoll’s ex and face of boob enhancing pills) Hear The Echo
Lorraine Keane: (TV presenting not sister of Roy or Robbie) Southern Vic
Shane Filan: (the only Westlifer that can sing) Black Apalachi
Ronan Keating: (so well known he doesn’t need a slightly insulting intro) L’Ami
Louis Walsh (a one-man pop factory) Parson’s Legacy

We had loads more fun and shennanagins before 11.54am, so click here to have a read of it.

Posted in Grand National, Horse Racing Tips, Racing, Sportsbook | 1 Comment »